think the first time that I heard that song I was 6 and I've liked it ever since. I especially love the refrain. How true, no? I mean, who hasn't tried to please co-workers, friends, family, boyfriends, ex-boyfriends, even strangers, when you want to make a good impression?! What crap. Really. It isn't possible to please all those people. Someone will gripe, guaranteed.
So, the other million-dollar thought that I have is to be happy. No joke. I'm serious. I was miserable for the last 3 years. Well, sometimes I was happy, but it was so fleeting. You see, I don't know how to set boundaries. I never learned, but I have now and it's high time that I put that into practice. Instead of worrying about everyone else and how to solve their problems, I believe it's best if I just concentrate on my own and let those people take care of them. After all, I am responsible first for my own happiness and then I can attend to others. I was raised in a family, who believed that we should always put others before ourselves, but I saw how that didn't work. My mother or my aunts or even me and my sister would get so angry when our needs weren't being met and we would blame everything and everyone for it, except ourselves. And then a brilliant thought came to my mind about 3 years ago and I thought much like Ricky Nelson that the problem was we (my mother, my aunts, myself, and my sister) trying to please everyone, but not ourselves. The men in my family seemed to be much better at setting boundaries.
They didn't have such a hard time saying "NO?. My sister once asked me for advice about a particular guy she was dating. I told her, Don't think like a woman, think like a man. She laughed, but I was serious. For real, there are times when a woman can be "too soft" and "too relenting". There are times when a woman can learn from her dad or brother ways to be diplomatic, but stern. There are also a few guys out there who would benefit greatly if they took the time to observe how a woman can really nature and care. What a guy-magnet they would be if they took the initiative, the first to say I love you and "Are you okay?. A little care goes a long way . . . Speaking of, I am missing that right at this very moment. Even better than sex, is a kiss on the forehead and an exclamation, Oh my gosh, you are so beautiful! Women never get sick of hearing that.